SATURDAY, MARCH 28, 2009 4:43 PM, CDT
There’s lots of sayings for this point of the journey. It is darkest before the dawn. Without sorrow we wouldn’t appreciate joy. Go ahead – add your favorite if you’d like. Or tell us a funny joke and help us laugh. We could use it.
Ya’ know, Kev was really upset this week. His scar tissue/adhesions hurt. His dressing changes hurt. His PICC line hurts. He doesn’t have much energy. And he was sick and tired of it. He was upset. He wouldn’t even look at the poor nurse during his home health visit Friday, much less talk to her. He just glared.
I tried to put it in perspective. “Look,” I said, “surely you will have the most blessed, easiest adulthood ever given what you have been through. You’ve earned it.” Didn’t help. Next I tried tough love. “I’m going to give you a though love lecture, (I warned him) it will last 97 seconds…’Look, buddy, if you don’t snap out of it I will bring you down to the hospital and show you the kids who will never get well, who have it much worse than you’…blah, blah” for 97 seconds. Then I hugged him. He still cried. And so did I.
It was a no good, horrid, very bad, awful week. We need those, remember? So we can cherish the good ones. RIGHT – that’s what all of the inspirational one liners tell us. It must be true.
Jeff’s uncle died and Jeff was 1,300 miles away and couldn’t share in the grief process with his family, and his work was stressful so he really couldn’t focus on his uncle’s life nor the family he left behind the way Jeff wanted. And things aren’t going so swell for me at work right now so I am hurt and short fused. And Phil is 17 and uncertain about what life holds for him and why he has to wear a scrum cap in rugby when the other dudes don’t have to since it makes him looks less cool. And Kate is a 13 year old girl which means that she spent the entire week in school with other 13 year old girls, which can sometimes be a hard place to spend your days (if I remember correctly.) And so none of us had a particularly joyful week.
Except Cooie. Our dog seemed quite content every single day this week. Which brings me back to the darkness before the dawn. I really have to believe that this was the week of darkness, for my rock solid strength is getting fissures that tend to crack at 2:37 AM. I spring leaks when everyone is sleeping – or when anyone asks about me personally. So, here’s to the dawn coming soon!